I’m walking down a boulevard of despair and depravity. It’s a lonely walk and I know that the longer I continue on this path, the closer I get to darkness. Despite cognizing, I keep moving on severing every bond that I once cherished, not only because they hold me back but because I don’t wish to drag the ones at the other end down with me. Even as I write I can feel the darkness wrapping around me and changing me. I can hear the sounds of those breaking bonds loud and clear as I progress into the abyss.
One may ask “Why?” It is a difficult question for me to answer. If human beings cannot feel each others’ pain, they can never truly understand one another. So if someone hasn’t experienced the same pain as I have experienced and still continue to experience, he/she will never understand why I do the things that I do. Let’s just put it this way that my goals lay in the darkness. I know that it comes at the cost of my soul being forever lost in the mazes of hatred but it is a choice I’ve made myself.
I’ve long since closed my eyes and embraced the darkness inside me. It has always been there for me. It is my companion, my source of power and my way of life. It is my greatest weapon and I intend to strike back with it at those who’ve made me suffer. I seek power which lies in the darkness and if I have to sever every last bond I have to achieve it, then I won’t falter.
Vengeance will bring me closure. I know I wasn’t like this before and I realize that being consumed by hatred turns you into a completely different person but being human, I need a reason to exist; I need something to fill up the gaping void within me and this hatred is all I really have……